Do you ever have a voice in your head warning that something might go wrong? It’s not always a bad thing. Anxiety gets a bad reputation, but sometimes, thinking ahead to potential problems helps us prepare.
The challenge is knowing when caution becomes excessive worry – when a helpful warning turns into a full-blown spiral.
Not all anxious thinking is useless. The term defensive pessimism describes mentally running through worst-case scenarios to stay ahead of them. Some examples include:
- A student who worries about failing an exam, which motivates them to create a study schedule
- Someone preparing for a presentation fears technical difficulties, so they bring backup slides.
- A traveller who imagines getting lost in a new city, so they buy physical maps just incase their phone battery dies
This kind of thinking can motivate preparation rather than just causing stress. The problem arises when the brain doesn’t stop at helpful caution and shifts into constant threat detection mode.
When vigilance becomes exhausting
Hypervigilance is like an alarm system that never shuts off. Instead of solving problems, it creates new ones such as:
- Burnout from being in a constant state of high alert
- Struggles with being present – it’s hard to enjoy anything when you’re always bracing for disaster
- Relationship strain – people might not understand it if you need constant reassurance
- Avoidance behaviours – staying away from situations that seem “risky” but are actually fine
Have you ever noticed how anxious thoughts escalate? Here’s how it usually happens:
- A small event: “I made a mistake at work.”
- A leap in logic: “My boss is going to think I’m incompetent.”
- Full-blown catastrophe: “I’ll be fired, never find another job, and end up broke and alone.”
These patterns are common and predictable. The good news is they can be interrupted.
How to challenge anxious thinking
The next time your mind wanders into worst-case territory, try this:
- Reality-test your worries – Keep track of how often your feared outcomes actually happen. Chances are, it’s not as frequent as your mind suggests.
- Look at past resilience – You’ve handled tough situations before. What got you through them? You’re more capable than your anxiety tells you.
- Ask the “Even if” question – “Even if this went wrong, would it actually be unbearable?” Most of the time, the answer is no.
- Spot thought distortions – Are you assuming the worst? Mind-reading? Thinking in extremes? Recognising these patterns makes them easier to counter.
On some days, challenging anxious thoughts might not be enough, and that’s OK. Try these suggestions instead:
- Short bursts of movement – Jump, stretch, run up the stairs. Anxiety can manifest as restless energy, so sometimes it needs a physical reset.
- Engage your senses – Listen to music, eat something with strong flavours, or hold something textured. Grounding in the present helps pull you out of the spiral.
- Competence reminders – Do something you’re good at. Completing even a small task will boost confidence.
- Permission to struggle – You don’t have to “fix” anxiety in the moment. Sometimes, just acknowledging it reduces its hold. Try saying something like, “I notice I’m having some anxiety before this presentation. It makes sense – it’s important to me and I want to perform well.” Acknowledging difficult emotions is more effective than trying to suppress or get rid of the feelings.
Anxiety isn’t something to eliminate – it’s something to understand and work with. Learning to balance caution with calm means recognising when your mind is being helpful and when it’s running in circles.
To learn more, check out our ‘Being Human’ podcast episode with anxiety expert, Prof. Jon Abramowitz.
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